Using Cocky & Funny With Women
Dear
Dave,
I'll keep this short and sweet... (you probably get this all the time
and are sick of hearing it although i did not yet read a response so
I'll quit prematurely apologizing.) I'm like a 6-7 and want to date
8-9's. I'm slightly above average looking and want to date girls above
my range. Is this possible? I can't settle for less so how can I pull
this off with out getting rejected 9 out of 10 approaches??
>>>MY COMMENTS: This is a very interesting combination of
questions...
First of all, what would be so bad about only having 1 out of 10 women
who are "8-9" range go out with you?
Just think of it...
You could make 10 women feel good by approaching them and boosting their
self esteem, and one of them would wind up going out with you. You'd
probably spend about 60 minutes of time, and about 147 calories of
energy (try a Zone bar or something if you begin to feel tired).
Investment: One hour plus 147 calories
Return: A date with an unusually attractive woman.
I'd play that game with you all day long. I think you see where I'm
going with this.
The problem most guys have is that they imagine the 9 times that they
don't wind up with a date as being "cold, hard, shut down" style
rejections. And unless you have no class or tact at all, this just isn't
going to happen.
At the Double Your Dating LIVE! seminar, my friend Orion shared his
perspective when it comes to meeting women. (I've personally seen this
guy get 25 women's phone numbers in three days... with my own two eyes)
His objective is "to make women smile". He likes to see if he can make a
woman smile when he starts talking to her. Then, if she's the kind of
woman that he'd like to date, he gets her information.
Think of it! He wants to find out if SHE'S THE KIND OF WOMAN HE LIKES by
seeing if he can make her smile before he decides if she's the kind of
woman he'd like to date. Interesting new way of looking at things.
To answer your first question, OF COURSE YOU CAN DATE WOMEN THAT ARE
MORE PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE THAN YOU!
Look around... you'll see all kinds of stunning women with average guys.
It's actually the rule, rather than the exception.
And try making women smile when you meet them... and find out if they're
beautiful on the INSIDE as well as the outside before you choose to see
them again.
***QUESTION***
WOW! yeah, that's the best word i can describe your techniques with.
I've been in situations where i can't help but smile, or even burst out
laughing when i see the magic work... keeping a straight face can be
hard just because i never thought it would work so well. anyway, to the
point: I've been using the 'cocky/funny/ you can't get what you want' on
this girl. well it was working well, but one instance she was
discouraged, and i wasn't sure what to do. i felt bad, like i broke her
or something... i was hoping you could help me with a line that would
give her, or any other girl alike, a good feeling after they turn around
and feel bad. i wanted to make sure and not turn into 'PUSSYMAN' to make
her feel better. rather, something to encourage her to pursue me, and
give her the 'it'll be worth your while impression.' Your advice seems
to have covered everything but this, or i just missed something. help
make it clear. I appreciate the time you put into saving our lives. I
think i was on the verge of wasting a lifetime before i was introduced
to your work.
F. F.
Toronto
>>>MY COMMENTS: One of the things you need to watch for when you're
learning to be cocky+funny is GOING TOO FAR. I've seen guys get a little
too cocky, while forgetting that FUNNY is a key component of the
formula... and then winding up turning a woman off.
I've done it myself a few times...
Just remember, if you wind up coming across as arrogant and hurting a
woman's feelings, you need to change the frame of what's going on.
Try saying:
"Lighten up... what, you don't have a sense of humor?"
This tells the woman you're talking to that it was a joke without you
turning into a wussy in her eyes. Then add more humor.
Women are very adaptable, and if you take things too far, just remember
to diffuse the situation quickly and learn from it. Once she sees that
you were just busting on her, she'll most likely bounce right back.
Unfortunately, too many guys will turn into insta-wuss and start
apologizing. Don't do that!
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dave,
You are more than just the man, you're the man's man. I don't know how
the hell you did it, but you've done what Freud couldn't--figure out
what a woman wants. Buy the BOOK!!!! There's so much more to learn from
it, including BRIDGES and SEX SECRETS. In Sex Secrets, Dave even teaches
you how to transition into the position that woman hate, but men
love...DOGGY-style!!!! You can't beat this. You had better believe I've
got a SUCCESS STORY.
My cousin (he has a long-term girlfriend) and I wanted to work on our
C&F, so we decided to go to Barnes and Noble...like you said normal
places. NOTE: he went to work on his C&F, but not to meet women.
Anyways, I tell you what: it's nerve racking as hell approaching a girl,
but each time I went and talked to girl I became more and more
confident. I RECOMMEND this to anyone: find a friend who has some balls
and go with him...it was good having the support, and we had an awesome
time. In the end, my cousin got this hot ass model chic's e-mail, along
with the usually "you're kind of rude." (He accused her of faking a
cell-phone Call ...LOL) But whatever, it worked. Anyways, later we met
this chic...I didn't have anything to lose, so I went balls to the wall
with the C&F. She completely dug it, she was hinting at sex and all
that. PROBLEM: I eventually found out she was married, and like you say,
there's too many women out there to ruin relationships. The point is
THAT A MARRIED WOMEN WANTED TO RISK HER MARRIAGE TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO
SHE FOUND ATTRACTIVE!!!!!!!!! My question is this. We sometimes found
that our jokes didn't always catch. For example, my cousin walked into
Ravegirl and accused the waitress of stealing. LOL. She didn't quite
take the joke, and she got all pissy (Don't worry he didn't apologize).
How do you hint that what your saying is supposed to be a joke? Should
you smile (I know you say to avoid this)? Also, what books other than
Comedy Writing Secrets do you recommend? Also, we're both attractive
(I'm getting a 9 at HotorNot.com), thus we have to work on the FUNNY
part of C&F because chics assume the cocky part.
PS. Don't forget to keep us posted on the videos or audio tapes of the
seminar. I couldn't make it.
PPS. Even when we failed, we laughed our asses off. It was great. Just
make sure that your partner pushes you to go by YOURSELF to talk to the
chic.
--Student in NY,
21 years old
>>>MY COMMENTS: You have some great points here... and I think that
you're going to find your balance very soon. A quick distinction that
I'll point out to you:
When you're first meeting a woman, I think it's better to just get the
email/number and leave. Then, when you email, talk on the phone, and
meet up later start being more cocky and funny...
This will probably help you out A LOT. As for married women... I don't
recommend going there. A final note: If you're a pretty good looking
guy, you might turn down the cocky, and turn up the funny. Women
perceive good-looking guys who act cocky as MAJOR PLAYERS, and too much
cocky too soon can backfire on you. Learn the art of the "sly smile"...
squint a bit and smile just barely. This says "I just teased you but you
didn't get it..." It's great.
***QUESTION***
Hey David,
Your book is pretty amazing, and before I even bought it I started
experimenting with your ideas, and already know they can work. However
there is one question that pervades, will this work on different
culture? I am arabic, and must wonder if this will work with Indians,
Pakistini's, Arabs, and other different cultures? Just curious if you
already knew, otherwise, you'll probably hear from me on my success
stories.
FJ
>>>MY COMMENTS: I cannot personally attest to the fact that my materials
work across all cultures, I do get emails from all over the world saying
that they do. I personally think that all women will respond to a
confident, funny guy... how could they help it?
***QUESTION***
Dave,
Hey, your COCKY + FUNNY stuff is nice! It works most of the time since I
tried it. I am currently dating a cute chick I approached two days ago.
She was watching our basketball game....
I have a question... Would it be alright if I add a little "sweetness"
in the COCKY+FUNNY attitude? I am just curious because a lot of girls I
know love sweet guys, and I was wondering if it could be a good
addition. If it is, could you give me an example. I would very much
appreciate it. Thanks Dave, and keep up the GREAT work.
G.D.H.
Philippines
>>>MY COMMENTS: Don't be "too sweet too soon." If you're overly
attentive, etc. early on with a woman she'll see you as needy, which
isn't attractive. It's OK to be a little bit sweet, sure. For instance,
let's say you've been seeing her for a few weeks. Get her a flower, and
tell her you were thinking of her. What not to do: Buy her a dozen roses
and bring them with you to the first meeting.
Get it?
***QUESTION***
Hey dave here's a little ego boost for you. Been playing around here on
the net for some time with little success. Bought your book. Read it and
tried to apply it.
This is the scoop. two weeks before I purchased your book I answered an
ad to a 8 1/2 to a 9 3/4 and received of course no reply. I used your
tip "what playing hard to get already? Nice. Write me." and she replied.
Know two days later she pulls her ad. I figure she hooked up with some
one so I move on right. Guess what a month latter her ad pops up. I
figure what the heck and I writer a letter. This time instead of being
chatty I loaded up the plan and headed for Tokyo.
This is a close copy of the letter I wrote:
"Back again?
Sorry to see you got dumped. I think you should rewrite your ad and
remove your picture. In your ad you wrote Its getting hard trying to
find some one it makes you sound kind of needy. Are you a needy kind of
girl? If you are I needy some one to fold my laundry. That should give
you a sense of purpose.
If you would like a picture of me send me your email, but you have to
promise not to drool all over your self and the key board."
I thought I was being kind of harsh, but I got a good laugh out of it.
Surprise she wrote back today and said she liked my style. I hadn't
heard from her in a week and wrote her off and boom there was her real
name and email address. Got to hand it to you dave this stuff works.
My question is what have you heard about patterning? I've read a little
on it... and wonder have you tried any of this stuff? Does it really
work? Also do you use the three second rule?...
Well ttfn
gb
>>>MY COMMENTS: Great job being Cocky, Funny, and just Charming in
general. Nice one.
As for other techniques... I've tried just about every single idea you
can imagine, and I teach the things that work best. Feel free to try
other ideas, but I think you'll find just as I have that nothing can
compare to using the combination of materials that I teach.
***QUESTION***
David,
My friend Leo turned me on to your newsletter. THANKS L.!!
Tried the email technique with a stunning Latina beauty at Kinko's.
Spotted her as she worked, she was dressed to impress. Timed my work to
finish when she did. Saw her in line, ready to pay. Scooped up my stuff
and got in line behind her. Asked if her if all was going okay, chatted
about what she did, it turned out to be related to what I do. She had
been in the field about a year. Then she moved to the register. Then
when a second register opened up - I brushed past her without a backward
glance. Wondered how to tease etc. Saw a line piling up behind her - she
was trying to pay with a $100 bill. So of course I teased her about
holding up the line... and showing off... she apologized, that her boss
had given her the large bill to pay with. Anyway I went back to my
business, winding it up just in time to see her headed out the door. She
was already halfway into the street when I called out, stopped her, made
quick conversation. Asked her if she had e-mail. She said no. I said "do
you have electricity?" (Stole your line verbatim - I HAVE NO SHAME,
DAVID, when it comes to stunning Latinas! Besides it was good fun!!) She
said yes, clearly on the defensive. I asked her if they'd given her a
business card yet. She said no, I looked condescending, and pulled out a
pen and paper. I asked for the phone number, and promised I'd only call
her EIGHT TIMES A DAY!! (Yes, yes, no shame whatsoever!) She hesitated
as she was about to write down the number - asked if this was about
business - (perhaps she was considering which number to give)- I said NO
- because I do not need professional networking, I'm interested in
WOMEN. But then I remembered to keep it fun, and said with a grin, "or
maybe it is business, who knows, we'll see." Keep her guessing and all
that. Anyway, I GOT THE NUMBER!! I'll keep you posted. Anyway, it was
TEXTBOOK!! And it was easily under three minutes. It was under one, I
suspect.
One small point: I wonder if women dress to impress each other, sure,
but more generally as an expression of power or strength. This chick had
her colors flying, but seemed shy and controllable. I wonder if the
power of your approach is that it bypasses their defenses (their looks)
by ignoring them - or not getting gah-gah over their looks anyway - not
getting impaled on the defensive breastworks so to speak - and instead,
attacks with our own strength. Very interesting stuff. I must confess I
am concerned about how to maintain this kind of posture if we go out. I
usually do well on first dates, but would like to try some of your
stuff; also I am thinking I could keep relationships less deep, more
fun, and generally lighter with your approach.
LOL about the whole thing. All the best.
-H
PS Any tips on how to get her to go out? I met her yesterday (Thursday.
I left a message today (Friday) late in the day - it was a cellphone
number - told her I was the guy who had met her while she was holding up
the line at Kinko's, and told her I was "a few calls behind." Left my
name, but not my number. Told her I'd call again when I got a chance.
Casual tone and all. Next move? Yeah I know, get more emails and phone
numbers, and call my other girlfriends. But besides that! What's my next
move with her. For what it's worth, she is from a somewhat conservative
culture, dressed expensively. I had planned to talk with her once, talk
about what music she likes or a nice spot to meet, then get off the
phone WITHOUT asking her out, leave her hanging for a day or so. It's
not my style, I'm usually two-fisted, straight ahead, direct but fun, a
gentleman but forceful. But I do want to learn here. So how would you
proceed, maestro?
>>>MY COMMENTS: Great story... just call her up and say:
"Hey, I'm going to be busy tonight and tomorrow evening, but let's get
together Friday for a cup of tea and some stimulating conversation..."
etc. I don't like the idea of wasting time on the phone with small talk.
Just do it.
***SUCCESS STORY***
I will confirm your advise to be correct and global. I live in Las Vegas
and most of the girls here are materialistic, superficial, "just plain
bitches" or bi - that's not so bad sometimes! ;) Unfortunately, this is
"typically American." I have much fun with them, but I am ultimately
disappointed with any American but the "girl next door" type. I thought
it was me for a while, but I now know I have a problem. You see, this is
both my bane and my success: I have spoiled myself rotten with foreign
women to the point that American women really only appeal to me for sex.
I travel to other countries, regularly, just to look for hot,
intelligent, "not American" women. I have been successful with women all
over the world without speaking any spoken language but English. Yes,
most intelligent foreign women speak English, but I communicate well
without knowing their language because of the same principles you teach.
To be successful with women, it is important to understand that PLAYFUL
TEASING, EYE CONTACT and CONFIDENCE are much more ATTRACTIVE than
anything you can repeat, do or own.
Additionally, the QUALITY of a woman who knows and responds to "cocky
and funny" is significantly higher than the girls who are impressed by
lines, looks or money. It is INSTINCTIVE for any good woman to look for
these characteristics in a man. Anyone can get better at anything with
study and practice. Keep up the good work!
BMW - Las Vegas
>>>MY COMMENTS: I agree with you... it is the more intelligent,
attractive, self-confident women that respond most powerfully to the
cocky/funny attitude. Most women respond very well to it, but the really
sharp ones just LOVE it.
And thanks for confirming that women from all over the world respond to
cocky/funny. I hear this often.
***SUCCESS STORY***
David,
Congrats on the TREMENDOUS seminar! It was cool to read the success
story about the Canadian...I sat next him at the event...I think most
any average guy can improve his game exponentially...rock on, my
Canadian friend!
I stopped at a neighborhood tavern after my plane landed; I immediately,
unconsciously used some great lines I learned at the seminar. I know, I
know...it's not all about pick up lines, but eventually she left my
apartment the next morning. Let's say it's a mindset. But here's what
worked:
The music on the jukebox was skipping painfully, so I looked at this
chick directly and said, "Excuse me, (pause) are YOU the DJ tonight?"
Then, "That's a pretty big purse, you carry a gun in that?" She was
laughing so....we were OFF to the races.
After some small talk she asked me what I did for a living, I said,
"That's kind of personal, what if you're a stalker?" then when she asked
again with puppy dog eyes, I said, "I'm an ass model, what do you
THINK?" I slapped mine then slapped HERS.
We chatted about a woman I met last week who had an $80 dildo (showing
her that I'm comfortable with sexuality), I finished my beer and said,
"I'm going to the Pontiac Bar, (pause, pause), you can come if you
want." (Taking her from first meeting though a date sequence while
leading the way...)
I gave her a little of the Geisha girl neck massage at the next bar, and
of course, split the tab. All that was left was to drove her straight
back to my place...not needing to ask for her permission. Thanks again,
David! You ought to include condoms with your books and seminars; size
LARGE for EVERYBODY.
D.
Illinois
PS. Hey all you knuckleheads out there! Buy David's E-book and future
materials...he's a class act and the sh** is UN-REAL!
>>>MY COMMENTS: Thanks for joining me at the seminar, you helped make it
great. And by the way, you're my hero. Rock on.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Wassup Dave??,
I just want to say that you are the man!! I'm sure you hear that a lot.
I've been reading your emails for the last two months but just haven't
put any of you ideas into action. But anyways I decided to use your
street pickup routine and works like a charm!! I used it twice and got
emails for BOTH women, they even gave me their phone numbers!!. I
already have a date this weekend with one of the hotties.
Let me just say that I'm an average looking guy and I'm a 6'2, 400 lb
black guy. I like to think of myself as a "Big Bodied Hottie." Works so
well for my confidence. I've never had a problem talking to women, I've
just never really knew what to say. With your tips, I feel invincible.
As soon as I get my next paycheck, I'm buying your book. Who knows what
I can be doing after I read that. You're heaven sent! Not Jesus or
anything, but pretty close. Keep spreading the word. Let this be an
example to all "Big Bodied Hotties" out there that it can be done, it's
just all in your head. The head
on your neck that is.
T.J.
Kansas City, MO
>>>MY COMMENTS: It always makes me smile to read letters like yours.
Nice. OK, if you're reading these fantastic stories right now and saying
to yourself "I want success like that",
then GOOD.
I'm glad.
And even better, I want to help you GET this kind of success for
yourself... and I want to help you meet the kinds of women that you've
always wanted to meet. If you're ready to really get a world-class
education in female psychology, approaching women, "getting physical"
and everything in between, then I think it's time for you to read my
eBook.
And if you haven't downloaded your copy of my online eBook "Double Your
Dating" yet, then you really need to go and do that right now. You can
download it to your computer and be reading it within a few minutes from
right now. You can download it here:
www.doubleyourdating.com - just follow the 'ebook' link and download
your copy. This book and the three bonuses that come with it are the
starting point for your success with women. Everything you read in these
articles will make more sense once you have read the book.
Talk to you soon,
David D.